Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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