Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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