awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
If I die, sorry about rent.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize