She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
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How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
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He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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