In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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