Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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