just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
