awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize