I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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