I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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