I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
