Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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