Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
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