I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
we're so committed to being not committed
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
