just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
