Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
