Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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