I love black thongs
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
