She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
