She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
