thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize