How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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