I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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