That's intense
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Randomize
