do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
