He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize
