What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
