so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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