I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
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