Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
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