just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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