Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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