I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
