My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize