Rock
Scissors
Fuck
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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