Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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