dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Randomize
