Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I wish you could order shots online.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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