Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize
