I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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