So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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