i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
