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• (415): View more from California

  I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota

  (415): View more from California

  everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  no, didnt close...

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (269): View more from Michigan

  quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  I asked her politely not to touch my dick

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Just high enough for therapy.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile

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• (914): View more from New York

  You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?

  (216): View more from Ohio

  We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit

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• (813): View more from Florida

  Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids

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• (425): View more from Washington

  YAS. BRING CRAB.

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