Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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