girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
