I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
