I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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