but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Randomize
