so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
