so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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