I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
